Losing a parent is a roller coaster of emotions.
My Dad died on Saturday morning and I felt like it was a chaotic series of ups and downs. Joy that he was finally pain free. Sadness for the loss. Relief that my Mom doesn’t have to be the primary caretaker anymore. Anxiety over all the paperwork. Annoyance that the screen door was broken by the Funeral Home employees. Amusement that the 1st visitor from my parents’ church brought lemon muffins and toilet paper.
I’m not worried about my Dad. He’s home with Jesus. Not a darn thing for me to worry about there.
But I am concerned about my Mom. She’s got plans to create a craft room and start going to water aerobics. She wants to shampoo the carpets and purchase a new couch. From a grieving perspective, she’s got a healthy thought process about staying in the house for at least a year before she makes big life-changing plans. She’s going to keep herself busy…and she’s going to get some rest.
I’m most concerned about when the sun sets. When she has to go to bed alone after having slept in the same bed with her husband for 52 years. I’m concerned about her finances as she waits for Social Security to transfer over. I’m concerned about when she has to go to the funeral home alone to pick up paperwork. I’m concerned about her safety, her sanity, her well-being.
How can I be so assured about where my Dad is, but be so concerned about my Mom’s well-being? It’s a sliding graph of hypocrisy to trust God with my Dad’s eternity, but question my Mom’s earthly care as a widow.
Scripture has helped these last few days with answering those questions.
“A father of the fatherless and a judge for the widows, is God in His holy habitation. God makes a home for the lonely…” ~Psalm 68:5-6
“Pure and undefiled religion in the sight of our God and Father is this: to visit orphans and widows in their distress…” ~James 1:27
“Learn to do good; Seek justice, Reprove the ruthless, Defend the orphan, Plead for the widow.” ~Isaiah 1:17
When I turn to scripture, I’m comforted and know that God will take care of my Mom better than I ever could. God has already put in place a plan for us, as believers, to care for the widows and the orphans. From across the country, I will rest assured her church family will care for her when I geographically can’t.
Losing a parent is such a hard rollercoaster, but so is caring for the parent left behind.
I’m requesting prayers this week for all the widows of the world, but most especially for those who are newly titled “widow.”