Tag: Conviction

Self-Denying or Self-Indulgent

We live in a world today that is all about the ‘ME.’  TikToks and IG posts are filled with “Top 20 Amazon Finds under $20” and the next “State of the Art Cookware.”  You simply must have the biggest TV to watch the Superbowl, and everyone must know about it.  I’m guilty of telling my husband I want the $1000 cookware that Gordon Ramsay swears by.  (Don’t worry, my husband gives me the same look you’re giving the screen as you read this!) Do I need it?  No.  But it’s so cool and the chefs use it.  It’s alright…you can roll your eyes at me!  We also often see talk of self-care and taking care of our own needs first.

Here, however, is where I out myself and possibly step on some toes in the process.  I can tell you the last time I went out for dinner but I can’t tell you the last time I gave to Missions at my church—at ANY church in the last 3 years.  Ask me about the last time I assisted a homeless person or prayed with one, yet I’ve made sure to cover myself in prayer when I had some shoulder pain.  Let’s look past monetary needs…when’s the last time I stopped myself from speaking negatively to my husband so I could have the last word and instead prayed silently for his relationship with Christ in that moment. I could go on forever.

The point here is, are we living a self-denying lifestyle or are we living a self-indulgent lifestyle?

We see a couple of examples in the Bible of people who chose a self-denying lifestyle.  Daniel declined to participate in the food and drink that King Nebuchadnezzar required of him.  He made a decision that he wouldn’t defile his body in things that God had said “No” to in order to please and honor Him.

We know the Jews told John the Baptist that he must’ve had a demon because he came fasting and refused to drink wine.  He chose to deny himself.  We see Paul talking multiple times about denying ourselves.  In fact, Paul wrote one of the most beautiful verses in Galatians 2:20.

“I have been crucified with Christ; and it is no longer I who live, but Christ lives in me; and the life which now I live in the flesh I live by faith in the Son of God, who loved me and gave Himself up for me.”

Are we living like this?  Are we recognizing that the Holy Spirit lives in us as believers and that our lives are not our own anymore?  We were bought with a price.  That price was the blood of the Lamb.  It shouldn’t be asking too much for me to stop indulging this world, instead denying ‘self’ and giving myself to serve God.

I pray that this week we recognize where our indulgences are.  The challenge I’m throwing out there is to begin denying self and start honoring God.

~Erin

Mowing Time

Recently our family added one of those manual push mowers that are reminiscent of the 1950s.  My husband wanted it to mow the steep bank near the road. I wanted it to mow without an engine near the beehives.  While I calmly pushed the mower back and forth in straight lines by the hives, I watched the bees flitter to and fro. 

While doing a seemingly menial task, I had several moments to mentally review a scripture that my small group has been memorizing as a group this last month. 

Philippians 2:14-15 (NASB) “Do all things without complaining or arguments; so that you will prove yourselves to be blameless and innocent, children of God above reproach in the midst of a crooked and perverse generations, among who you appear as lights of the world.”

I recited it a couple times, but I kept getting distracted by the rolls of sweat that were coming off my face and straight into my eyes.  I blinked several times and then started reviewing the scripture again.  Only to have it happen several more times.  

Finally, I stopped mowing, took off the bee suit hat and face shield, removed my glasses and started wiping my face off.  Put my glasses back on and they instantly fogged up.  Put the bees hat/face shield back on.  Sweaty hair stuck to my forehead and glasses.  Take hood off, fix hair, glasses smudged…and then…sweat rolls into my eyes.  

Insert frustration, some real tears, and a few choice words.

And then a bubble of laughter came out of my mouth.  There I was half in a bee suit in 100-degree heat of Alabama, with a 1950s-ish mower, and sweat stinging my eyeballs, when the first part of my memory verse came to mind.  “Do all things without complaining or arguments…”  

While the verse is specifically addressing the previous admonitions that Paul had mentioned in the Philippians letter, it sure did feel like it applied directly to me in that moment.  All the murmurings…all the discontentment…all the complaining in that moment were not useful. They weren’t assisting me with completing the task, nor were they going to exemplify Christ in that moment.  

I’m so grateful for the corrections that God’s holy word provides us; the conviction from the Holy Spirit for us to change course.  

It got me to reassess my own attitude in the moment of “lawn mowing time” with some heat, humidity, sweat and tears all mixed together.  

For each of us, I pray this next week will be one without complaining or argument.

~Emily

Bookworm Beliefs

True confession: I’m a self-proclaimed-avid-borderline-obsessed reader….a bookwork, if you will.  

What does this bookworm believe?

1. there are always more books to read

2. you can never have too many books waiting to be read

3. all children should be granted access to books

4. reading is my 1st choice for learning & recreation

I probably have more books in my house waiting to be read, than dollars in the bank account (now, that may be a tad bit of an exaggeration).   I always have a book in close proximity to me.  I have to check the copyright date of books prior to reading them.  I keep lists of books I have read, want to read, and want to read again.  I follow authors rather than celebrities on social media.  

My obsession with books is 2nd only to my obsession to Chapstick.  

One of my 2022 goals was to read the entire Bible.  So, when the Pastor of my church recently challenged the entire congregation to read the entire Bible together in 2022, it aligned perfectly with my own goal and with my fixation on reading.

During that challenge the Pastor also mentioned that our personal choices of how we spend our time often trumps our choices of how we spend time with the Lord.  He gave the example of how we may say we don’t have enough time to pray or read our Bible during our busy week, but we manage to make time to watch several football games.  The point?  What is more important…the football game or your relationship with God? 

That has marinated with me for several weeks.  Every single time I’ve picked up a book to read for recreation, I’ve questioned if I had finished my Bible reading plan for the day.  More often than I would have predicted, I had neglected the Bible for another book.  With some reflection of that revelation, I realized that the Holy Spirit was nudging me closer and closer towards focusing on Biblical reading before pleasure reading.  

In John 16:5 and in verse 16, Jesus repeatedly told the disciples that he was leaving them.  He was preparing them for a time that they would not be able to physically see Him anymore.  However, in between those two verses is an interesting statement about the work of the Holy Spirit.

But I tell you the truth; It is for your good that I am going away.  Unless I go away, the Counselor will not come to you; but if I go, I will send him to you. ~John 16:7 (NIV)

It’s easy as a Christian to think that being with Jesus forever would be the best thing for us.  Yet, in John 16:7, we hear Jesus tell us that it’s better for us to not be with him and that if he didn’t leave, the Holy Spirit couldn’t come. Essentially Jesus was saying that it’s better for us to have the Holy Spirit. With that assertion, comes the knowledge that having the Holy Spirit in our lives means that we will be open to feeling convictions about our behaviors.   

We’re a mere three weeks into the New Year and already I’m finding myself convicted by the Holy Spirit regarding my reading behavior and my goal to read through the Bible this year. 

It’s time for this bookworm to adjust my beliefs…I need to focus on my Bible goals. 

Are you open to those nudges from the Holy Spirit?  

~Emily

Playful Sightlessness

I was playing pretty rough with my lab, when he pushed back on his back legs with his front paws started coming forward right at my face.

I couldn’t move out of the way fast enough.  Instead, I felt an intense pain on my left eye and a burning down the side of my face.  I fully thought the dog had inadvertently blinded me.  

In that moment, I stood with tears flowing, tentatively opening my eyes with a tremendous fear that the blurriness in my left eye was indicative of my new life without sight in that eye.  

While blinking repeatedly and checking for blood, I wondered if this is how Saul felt in Acts 9 when God struck him blind prior to his conversion to Christianity.  It was in that moment, I had a glimpse into the pure panic that Saul must have felt. 

As my sight began to clear, my thoughts shifted to the parable in Luke chapter 6, when Jesus says that the blind wouldn’t be able to lead the blind.  

“He also told them this parable: ‘Can the blind lead the blind? Will they not both fall into a pit?’” Luke 6:39 (NASB)

The implication is clear. No, the blind can’t lead the blind.  You can’t lead if you yourself don’t know about particular situations.  Perhaps it means that you can’t teach if you haven’t been the student.  Maybe it means, one leader isn’t effective unless they’ve been an effective follower.  

It’s a poetic way to showcase the expectation that a strong Christian who leads, disciples, and mentors others, are likely the ones who have studied the Word, spent time in prayer, and have been discipled themselves.  

What does that mean for women walking with Jesus? It means that we need to ensure we are constantly strengthening our relationship with God if we are in leadership positions. It also means that we have to assess those who are in leader positions around us and discern if we are being appropriately led.  

My moment of temporary blindness from playing with my dog, was actually one of conviction.  Conviction that I need to be deliberately growing to be a better leader, as well as assessing who is teaching me. 

It’s amazing how lessons come from our everyday life…conviction from canine playing.

~Emily

Wasp Stingers & Convictions of the Holy Spirit

On Friday, just as I was getting ready to leave work, I felt a pin-prick stab in my stomach followed by an intense burning sensation.  I moaned ‘nooooooo’ in despair, as I watched a wasp fly away from my mid-section.  The last time I was stung by a wasp it took over a year before it stopped flaring up bright red and alternating between burning and itching. 

Earlier in the week at Bible Study, the teacher gave us a scripture with a nugget of truth that left me feeling the sting and burn of conviction. In that moment, I knew I wasn’t being prayerful, respectful, or loving in one area of my life.  Like the wasp sting, it hasn’t gone away after several days.  

The Bible is very clear that the feeling of conviction is from the Holy Spirit; the third part of the trinity. In my experience, these nudges from the Holy Spirit are in areas that the Lord finds displeasing.  Normally, they are behaviors that are sinful, that need repentance, and that are forgiven if we truly change our direction.  

John 16:8 (NASB) says, “And He, when He comes, will convict the world regarding sin, and righteousness and judgement.” 

You see, the key to conviction is that there will be judgement associated with it.  Therefore, we can’t ignore it…we have to actually do something to change the behavior.  If we fail to change behavior as a result of conviction, or we ignore that pinprick on our conscious, then we stay in a sinful spiral.  And no good comes from that. 

Josh McDowell wrote, “Having convictions can be defined as being so thoroughly convinced that Christ and His Word are both objectively true and relationally meaningful that you act on your beliefs regardless of the consequences.”

Just like the wasp sting, with its immediate pinch and days of itchy burning, the moments during and after a conviction spurred by the Holy Spirit, should also invoke feelings of a sting and continuous burn…until the behavior has been repented and changed.  

This week I’m praying that the ladies of the porch will listen to the Holy Spirit when you feel that moment of conviction…and that the wasps stay away from you!

~Emily

Conviction Truth

Recently I had a gal from my church share some truth with me….and it involved one of my Facebook posts from several months ago.  There was nothing sinful about the post, but she pointed out that the content could be a stumbling block for others, considering I am in a leadership position as the women’s ministry director.

Her truth gave me pause.  It created a scenario where I went to the Lord in prayer to ask for forgiveness and ask for Him to reveal any other places in my life where I may have been blind to such occurrences.

She was right.  And more than that, she was right to tell me.

How often have I known that I should speak to someone about a perceived wrong or sinful behavior? The Lord has prompted me before but I’ve been reluctant to follow that nudge.

Why? Why am I negligent in confronting truth with other Christians?  I know I’m capable of it. I am able to tell Erin when I think something is wrong. I’m able to speak to my husband about truth. Why can’t I tell others?

I’ve been thinking about this for a few days and I’ve concluded that it’s primarily fear that inhibits me from speaking truth into another’s life.  I don’t want to be shunned, or I don’t want to be wrong, or I don’t want to tarnish the relationship.

The truth of the matter is this…if God wants someone to feel convicted about a sin in their life, then He’s going to somehow let them know.  That may be through my words, or it could be through a podcast, or a Bible study, or countless other methods.

However, that does not absolve me of my responsibility to listen to the voice of the Holy Spirit.  Repeatedly throughout scripture, Christ-followers are instructed to hold one another accountable to “right” living.  For instance, Colossians 3:16 (NIV) states “Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts.”

I am grateful to those around me that are bold enough to speak truth into my life…and for pointing out where I may be straying.

As I walk through this next week reflecting how to better speak truth into other’s lives, I would love to hear your thoughts on truth convictions.  Come to the porch and share your thoughts!

~Emily

Conviction Truth