I’ve always had a secret jealous streak when I think about the relationships that the disciples had with Jesus. They walked with Him, slept near Him, and ate with Him. They literally had a front-row seat to His teaching, to His storytelling, and to His faithful prayer life. They had THE model right there with them…day in and day out.
There are times in my Christian walk that I’ve struggled with following the guidelines provided by Jesus. I’ve prayed and felt like I didn’t hear an answer. I’ve failed again and again. I have this irrational thought that if I had walked at the same time as Jesus, that somehow that would make my relationship stronger with Him.
I know it’s irrational. Yet, it makes me slightly jealous that the disciples were able to ask questions face to face. They were able to make a prayer request and hear the voice of God respond. I wish I had the literal face-to-face time with Jesus, in the flesh.
This week, while doing my homework for my small group “Maximum Joy” by Dr. David Anderson, I had a realization. We all have the opportunity to fellowship with the Lord, much like the disciples did. In 1 John 1:1:3, John wrote “We proclaim to you what we have seen and heard, so that you also may have fellowship with us. And our fellowship is with the Father and with his Son, Jesus Christ.”
Scripture tells us that if we are following the direction of the Word, as well as the insights provided by the ones who walked with Christ, then we too can have the sweet joy of fellowship with the Lord.
I’m excited that the next several months studying 1 John will help me have deeper intimacy that leads to fellowship rather than just a relationship. I’m also excited that it’s going to dispel this idea that I should be jealous of the disciples when I too can have a deeper relationship with Jesus.
Who else is harboring secret jealousy? Come to the porch and tell us…